Nothing is as real as a dream. The world can change around you, but your dream will not. Responsibilities need not erase it. Duties need not obscure it. Because the dream is within you, and no one can take it away. Author: Unknown
I was an unexpected child born to Jesse and John Berton on December 16, 1946 in Tyler, Texas. My sister and four brothers were almost grown when I arrived and making their own way in the world. Therefore, it was as if I were an only child after my brother Tony left home - he was eight years older than I. I know that they thought me quite spoiled as I got everything they never were fortunate enough to have. This created some jealousy for a few of them and due to the age difference I missed that closeness we could have had. My Dad was a devout Catholic and my Mother's folks were Baptists. Even though I was not planned my Dad certainly had his own ideas about how I was to be brought up. I started the first grade in Mother Francis Catholic School against my Mother's wishes I'm sure as I don't ever remember her stepping foot in the Catholic church. I still have many painful memories of my experiences there as I was constantly being punished without cause. It was a rigid school and the nuns were anything but holy I thought. I can remember being sent home for wearing my blouse outside of my skirt. I was expelled once for walking by the boys restroom (they told my parents that I was spying on a boy in the restroom). I immediately began to question this religion and felt abandoned by my parents for not taking me away from there. I as hit with rulers and pinched on several occasions. Dad ruled where religion was concerned and I suppose they had an agreement of which my loving Mother was sorry she ever made.
Upon getting older I began to get very ill when attending mass with my Dad. I couldn't understand why everytime we went to mass I would become very ill and have to go outside to get fresh air. Repeatedly I would become sick only to leave and return for mass to end. I look back now and wonder if God had His eye on me and no longer wanted to see me subjected to to an atmosphere of condemnation. Not long after that I ran across the scripture that says,"Call No Man Father for there is only one Father and that is your Father in Heaven". I began to feel deceived that I had ever been taught to confess my sins before a mere man and not the mediator Jesus Christ it spoke of in the Bible. I knew that I could no longer call this man Father and soon after I withdrew myself totally from the Catholic religion that had only brought me much pain and disappointment. I searched for every excuse not to go with Dad anymore and yet I felt sorry for him that he had to continue on alone without me. I truly believe that this was the beginning of my battle with low self esteem and it was then that I began to withdraw somewhat from others to avoid any more abuse or pain. I built my own little world of protection and caught myself finding excuses to avoid those that brought me pain.
My Mother Jesse was the victim of Rheumatic Fever when she was 13 years of age and was not expected to live. I remember her telling me that if it had not been for one nurse, she probably wouldn't have survived but that wonderful nurse refused to give up on my Mom. Mother did live but was left with a damaged with a damaged heart valve and was warned that having a child could prove fatal for her. Not only did she have 5 children but I became the sixth one and of course you might know that I was the one birth that brought her close to death's door or so I was told. Back in those days, Catholics did not condone any method of birth control even if it meant the sacrifice of one's life and I'm sure my Mother would have had a much easier life if it had not been for her desire to please my Dad. My poor little Mother was 43 years of age when she had me. Most of my earlier life was spent staying to myself mostly. At age 10 years of age I had an awesome prayer life and Jesus was my closest friend with the exception of my love for nature and the many pets my Mother allowed me to have. I took frequent walks in the woods behind our house and would meditate with God and nature nearly every day. I loved nature and my pets and for me, it was an escape but yet something tangible that I felt I could hold on to and trust.
In my teens I drifted farther and farther away from my faith and the ways of the world began to engulf me. I was totally self centered and thought only of myself. My Dad and Mother seemed so far from me and due to their age, I wondered how could they possibly understand what I was going through. I felt imprisoned with my older parents and all I could think about was getting away and being on my own. Today I look back and wonder how I could have been so immature and thoughtless of the wonderful and loving secure home that I came from. I married young and the marriage failed after 14 years but I created three beautiful boys as a result of it. They all turned out wonderfully thank God and are today all good providers, honest, compassionate, dependable and wonderful fathers of which I cannot take all of the credit. Their Dad was a good dad and taught them to hunt, fish, and above all, he taught them to work hard and to provide for their own., In later years and another marriage I began to return to my former relationship with my creator and I changed not in a night but in gradual way I became a better person and Mother only than there were so many regrets and memories that I could not change. All in all I am grateful that I came from a God fearing family and because of that it paved the way for the faith I have today.
I had my first encounter with my maker and it was very awesome. In the front yard down came a large hand that covered the entire yard. I was not afraid but looked up to see the face of Jesus I guess it was. He spoke to me with his eyes and ask me to go with him and I wanted to but was afraid to leave my family, especially Mom and Dad. In my dream/vision I turned around and looked at my family as if to say what about them Lord. He knew the reason for my hesitancy and when I looked back He told me (with his eyes) that I couldn't’ go with Him if I didn't’ love Him more than Mother, Father, Sister and Brother. In an instant He was gone and my dream ended. After I woke I quickly dismissed it as just a dream and that the giant I saw in my dream was just my imagination. Anyway, who would believe me… and better yet, who would believe that I had an encounter with the Lord.
In about 1978 I had another dream/vision in which I saw a rider on a white horse and the rider was carrying a bow. I knew that this was a reflection of the end times and the very next day I went to the book of Revelation (never reading it before) and stopped abruptly when I came to:
Revelation 6:1-2
Now I saw when the Lamb opened one of the seals; and I heard one of the four living creatures saying with a voice like thunder, “Come and see.” And I looked, and behold, a white horse. He who sat on it had a bow; and a crown was given to him, and he went out conquering and to conquer. How could I have known about the horse and the rider but certainly how would I have known that he was carrying a bow? Once again I dismissed it as just another dream although in my subconscious mind I new that something was up with all of the similarity and sequence of my dreams.
I’ve seen a major earthquake in which the entire earth was shaking. The ground opened up, the mountains moved, and many were swallowed up in the process. Everyone and everything was chaotic and I sensed that this also was a glimpse into what is to come. In the book of Revelation I read the very details of my dream and I was in awe.
Revelation 16:18
And there were voices, and thunders, and lightnings; and there was a great earthquake, such as was not since men were upon the earth, so mighty an earthquake, and so great. Revelation 16:20 And every island fled away, and the mountains were not found.
One morning a few years later I was awakened by a loud sound (the sound of trumpets) early in the morning.. This dream had some credibility as the sound was so real and I knew as I was waking up this too was another message pointing to the end of time. It was a definite sound of one tone (several trumpets), that lasted about 5 seconds long. I could almost tell you what key it was in and it was so clear that I'd know it if I heard it again. Once again I found scripture to confirm what I had seen.
Revelation 8:6And the seven angels which had the seven trumpets prepared themselves to sound . . .In my final dream that occurred shortly before Wall Street fell, I can remember every detail of that dream and immediately upon waking I knew that this was once again no ordinary dream. I did tell Patrick my youngest son but I sensed that even though he acknowledged my comment out of respect, I could tell that he was hesitant to get involved in the discussion. This dream had had a significant impression on my life and I feel that God was allowing me to have a glimpse of the many hardships that many were soon to face.
In my dream I was on the top of a hill and in front of a old fashioned white house with wood siding.. Down all around me like a valley were, families and children some standing, some sitting, and some just sitting on the ground. They were all without food and were desperate to feed their children. I looked behind me to see many trying to enter my house and some did carrying out canned goods of which didn't seem to bother me. I saw God sweeping through the sky all above and around us from all directions displaying what seemed to be His wrath upon all mankind. Not knowing where I fit in I simply observed all that was happening around me. Somehow I felt no fear but only wonder and awe at what I was witnessing and all the time wondering how it applied to me. Later I decided if anything, it was an assurance that in my lifetime I will witness firsthand famine all around me and that there will be multitudes of people that will be searching everywhere for something to soothe the emptiness of their stomachs. Somehow that experience has given me comfort as I think that it was His way of letting me know not be fear and that He would take care of me and my own when the time comes.
Only a few weeks following my dream the market begin to fail and many once secure families were experiencing the reality of the possibility of losing their jobs, their life's savings, their 401 Ks, and their homes.. The comfort of feeling secure for many soon escalated to a heightened level of fear and uncertainty. Too much happening too quickly for one man to digest.
I cannot help but feel that something ominous is about to happen to all of us as the world has never been in such turmoil and unrest. There is a series of global indicators that seem to indicate we truly are truly in the last days and that the wrath of God is inevitable..
The good news is that God is with us all of the way - He will lead you out of your addiction, your pain, your depression and heal your broken heart. THERE IS ROOM AT THE CROSS FOR YOU
Never forget Gods loves you with a passion - All you have to do is Trust Him - That is what He wants....
I Am With You Always
This page was last updated: March 1, 2010
